It’s tough out there in the dating world, and with the increase of ghosting and messages left unread, women and men alike are often left wondering what they did wrong. In terms of relationship success and personal happiness, here are 18 of the biggest mistakes a woman can make.
Ignoring Red Flags
A lot of women are colorblind when it comes to dating flags. When you’re so determined for dating to work, it’s easy to brush off any early warning signs. Downplaying any concerns you have can be easy when you really like somebody, but it’s a common mistake you need to avoid.
Sacrificing Independence
A successful relationship doesn’t mean total dependence, yet many women sacrifice their own interests and goals for the sake of the relationship. This can be due to an over-reliance on a partner for validation or happiness – so much so that they don’t seek it elsewhere.
Poor Communication
PsychCentral points out that one of the worst assumptions you can make is that your partner is a mind reader. If you don’t tell them how you feel, they’re likely not going to know. If you’re also avoiding difficult conversations to keep the peace, this is a seriously detrimental mistake in relationships.
Neglecting Self-Care
Prioritizing your partner’s needs in a relationship is key, but this shouldn’t ever come at the price of your own well-being. Self-care is just as important as partner care, but sadly, many women make the mistake of neglecting their own needs, meaning stress and burnout are rife.
Unrealistic Expectations
Common unrealistic expectations in a relationship include thinking that love is enough to resolve every problem or comparing real-life relationships to what you see in the media. Many women make the mistake of expecting too much of their partners based on a romanticized notion, so it’s best to keep it real.
Overanalyzing and Overthinking
We’re all guilty of overthinking now and again, but it can be dangerous in relationships. Overanalyzing everything your partner says or does will lead to paranoia and assumptions, increasing anxiety in the relationship. Ultimately, this can result in an unnecessary breakdown of happiness.
Lack of Boundaries
Without boundaries, women in relationships can be the recipients of disrespectful behavior or even abusive treatment. Dr Sangeeta Pattanaik, via LinkedIn, explains that boundaries “help to keep a balance between you and your partner,” ensuring a healthy relationship. Make sure your boundaries are respected!
Neglecting Personal Growth
If you neglect your personal development for the sake of the relationship, this will only lead to resentment down the line. Neglecting personal growth can often stem from a fear of outdoing a partner or upsetting the current relationship dynamic, so try to find a balance between both of your priorities.
Putting Too Much Pressure on the Relationship
Relationships should complement your life as one source of fulfillment, yet many women put too much pressure on relationships to be their only source of happiness. This can also escalate if you expect a partner to fix any issues in your life and fully commit to it too early.
Avoiding Conflict
Some women might also suppress their feelings and concerns to avoid upsetting their partner. They may pretend everything is fine simply to avoid confrontation, but this only ensures that resentment builds up over time and that valid issues never get resolved. It’s simply not sustainable.
Lack of Financial Independence
“Four in five Americans believe that women stay in unhappy relationships due to lack of financial independence,” claims CNBC. This is true–relying solely on your partner for financial stability means that you’re preventing your own personal freedom, and this may result in you becoming trapped or powerless.
Sacrificing Your Career for the Relationship
Careers can often take a backseat in favor of personal relationships, with many people making the mistake of sacrificing their own career aspirations in favor of their partner’s wishes. Once again, this runs the risk of resentment over time due to missed opportunities and the feeling that you haven’t fulfilled your ambitions.
Losing Touch with Support Network
It’s understandable why people have less time for family and friends when they get into a new relationship. However, many women make the mistake of isolating themselves completely from loved ones in order to prioritize their partner. This neglect can lead to a lack of outside perspective and support–it’s not good.
Seeking Validation from External Sources
Many people fall into the trap of needing their relationship to look ‘Instagram-worthy’ or wanting validation from the masses. This isn’t a good look at all; constantly seeking approval from others only makes the relationship feel inadequate, so validation needs to come from within.
Becoming Emotionally Attached Too Soon
Many women become emotionally attached to someone very quickly, which can, unfortunately, lead to the risk of a broken heart if the relationship doesn’t work. Psychology Today explains that learning the difference between compatibility and initial attraction can be key to avoiding emotional attachment too soon, so give that some thought!
Settling for Less
The fear of being alone can often drive people to settle into a relationship. This can include lowering standards to accommodate a new partner just so they can say they’re in a relationship. Some women might also settle because they don’t believe they deserve anything better, but you absolutely do!
Ignoring Your Intuition
A woman’s intuition is powerful and should never be ignored, yet often we push down that niggling feeling. It’s very easy to try and rationalize a partner’s negative behavior because you want it to work, but failing to listen to that gut feeling can be one of the worst things you can do.
Striving for Perfection
Lastly, here’s a key reminder that ‘perfect’ doesn’t exist, and that’s okay. Striving for perfection in a relationship will only lead to disappointment. Many women put too much pressure on themselves to be the perfect partner, but all you can ever be is yourself. Remember those words!