Marriage thrives when you both understand and respect each other’s needs, but there are a lot of expectations in society that sometimes place unfair pressure on women. No one should feel compelled to live up to outdated norms when it comes to marriage, so here are 20 things we’ve listed that a woman should never feel obligated to do for her spouse.
Sacrifice Career Goals
A fulfilling career isn’t just about money—it’s about passion, purpose, and personal growth. Women should never feel pressured to abandon their professional dreams for the sake of their husband’s preferences or career path because both partners should cheer each other on, celebrating achievements instead of viewing them as threats.
Cook Every Meal
Cooking might be a daily necessity, but it’s not a job that automatically falls to one person in a marriage, and a woman shouldn’t feel like she’s failing as a wife if she doesn’t have dinner on the table every night, or prefers to order takeout after a long day. Sharing kitchen duties—or deciding together when it’s time for pizza delivery—is a much better approach.
Change Their Appearance
When a woman is comfortable in her own skin, she can show up more authentically in every part of her life, including her marriage, and any pressure to alter her appearance undermines the trust that a relationship is supposed to be built on. Personal style, body image, and self-expression are deeply personal choices that no one else has a right to control.
Handle All Housework
Dividing household responsibilities in a fair way, or even hiring help if needed, creates a more balanced and harmonious home environment, and carrying the weight of household responsibilities shouldn’t fall to the woman simply because of her gender. Household chores are part of everyday life, but they shouldn’t fall entirely on one person.
Give Up Personal Hobbies
Whether it’s painting, hiking, or knitting, hobbies provide a sense of accomplishment and relaxation, a good partner will encourage these pursuits, even if they don’t personally enjoy them. After all, maintaining individuality within a marriage is key to staying connected and happy.
Always Say Yes to Intimacy
Physical intimacy is a deeply personal and emotional connection that should always come from a place of mutual desire, and female spouses should never feel like it’s their responsibility to always be in the mood or to fulfill their husband’s needs at their own expense. Consent and communication are essential in a healthy relationship.
Take On All Childcare Duties
A partnership where both parents are involved not only lightens the load but also creates a stronger family bond.Parenting is one of the most rewarding and challenging aspects of life, and it’s a role that requires teamwork, because fathers are equally capable of nurturing and teaching their children, which is why these responsibilities should be shared.
Forgo Alone Time
Everyone needs time to themselves, it’s how we recharge, reflect, and maintain a sense of self, so why should women feel like they can’t take a few hours to read a book? In fact, those moments of solitude are often what help us show up as better partners and parents, and furthermore a loving husband will understand that taking care of yourself is just as important.
Manage All Emotional Labor
Remembering every birthday, scheduling appointments, organizing family gatherings, and keeping everyone’s lives running smoothly is no small task, yet it often goes unnoticed. Women frequently find themselves burdened with this invisible workload, but it’s not fair or sustainable, as emotional labor should be a shared effort in a marriage.
Stay Silent During Disagreements
Sharing thoughts and feelings openly strengthens the connection between partners and ensures that both voices are heard and valued, while healthy relationships require open and honest communication, even when it’s uncomfortable. Women should never feel like they have to bite their tongue or avoid expressing their opinions during a disagreement to keep the peace.
Follow Traditional Gender Roles
Society has come a long way, but the pressure to conform to traditional gender roles still lingers, with a woman often feeling obligated to be the primary caregiver, homemaker, or submissive partner, even if those roles don’t align with their values. Modern marriages are about finding what works for both people, not sticking to outdated scripts.
Accept All Financial Responsibility
Managing household finances is a big job, and it shouldn’t fall entirely on one person’s shoulders. Money matters are best approached as a team effort, with open communication and shared accountability, instead of the woman being made to handle all the budgeting or bill-paying.
Always Prioritize His Needs
Selflessness has its limits, and women shouldn’t feel like their husband’s needs and wants always come before their own, and it’s important to balance caring for your partner with taking care of yourself. A healthy relationship values both people’s happiness and well-being equally.
Forgive Without Accountability
Forgiveness can be healing, but it doesn’t mean sweeping problems under the rug. A relationship built on trust requires effort from both partners to grow and improve, and forgiveness should come with mutual understanding and a willingness to move forward together, rather than simply sweeping a husband’s mistakes under the rug.
Be His Social Secretary
Why does keeping track of social calendars, arranging gatherings, and maintaining friendships automatically fall to the wife? She doesn’t have to carry the burden of being solely responsible for the couple’s social life while their husband gets to simply show up.
End Friendships He Doesn’t Like
A supportive husband will trust his wife’s judgment and understand that her friends contribute to her happiness and well-being, and this is also why wives deserve the freedom to maintain meaningful relationships outside their marriage. Friendships are an important part of life, and no one should feel like they have to cut ties with people they care about.
Sacrifice Spiritual or Personal Beliefs
A marriage that values diversity of thought and respect for each other’s convictions is much stronger than one built on forced alignment, and faith and personal values are deeply individual to a wife and to a husband. The former should be free to explore or express their beliefs, without conforming.
Always Be “In the Mood”
Intimacy isn’t just physical—it’s emotional, and it requires both people to feel ready and willing, which is exactly why one partner should never feel obligated to be intimate if they’re not in the right space emotionally or physically. A caring husband will prioritize understanding and connection over unrealistic expectations, and knows not to pressure his wife.
Pretend to Be Happy
No one should feel like they have to put on a happy face when they’re struggling, yet there can be a lot of pressure on a woman to get on with things so as not to be labelled as emotional—yet women should feel safe expressing their emotions honestly. Pretending to be happy only masks deeper issues that deserve attention and care.
Take the Blame for Everything
And lastly: blame is rarely one-sided in any disagreement, and a wife might commonly feel like she has to take on all the guilt just to smooth things over. But spouses should be acknowledging that mistakes and misunderstandings happen on both sides, and focus on finding solutions together instead of assigning blame to one person.