Nowadays, people in relationships are expected to follow too many rules. From the first date, society dictates that we do everything a certain way. However, once you get older, you stop caring what society says, so here are 18 rules you can officially ditch after turning 50!
Waiting a Certain Amount of Time to Text
If you’re 50, you didn’t grow up texting, and you don’t need to be beholden to ridiculous texting rules today. Modern dating advises us to wait a certain amount of time to text, such as three days after a date, but this hampers communication, which older people know is essential for healthy relationships.
Playing Hard to Get
Playing hard to get is a dating tactic we all recognize, but it’s evolved into a modern relationship rule that makes it difficult to connect with your partner. It quickly becomes tiresome, so if you’ve turned 50, you won’t have time for insincere behavior and superficial games.
Obsessing Over Likes
Social media has transformed how we have relationships, and not always for the better. According to Psychology Today, social media PDA is frequently used to overcompensate for unhappiness, with couples obsessing over ‘likes.’ However, hitting 50 makes you realize the importance of living in the moment with your partner.
Not Mentioning Your Exes
Talking about your previous partners all the time isn’t recommended, but maturity comes with age, so you shouldn’t feel the need to hide your past. By age 50, you’ll likely have a few exes, so it shows maturity if you and your partner can disregard relationship rules and discuss the past.
Designating Who Pays the Check
Relationship rules often designate roles to the people involved based on traditional gender stereotypes, so society still expects men to pay the check. This places all the financial pressure on male partners while devaluing women who’ve spent decades building their careers. After 50, just split the check!
Trying Not to Look ‘Desperate’
If you’re actively dating someone, it seems like common sense to tell them you like them. However, many young people worry about looking desperate, so they act nonchalantly and keep their true feelings quiet. If you’re over 50, scratch all that; just be upfront about your feelings!
Never Calling First
If you’re re-entering the dating scene in your 50s, one of the first rules you can ditch is never calling first. Some people say that calling someone first after a date is a sign of desperation, but it’s actually a sign of interest. If you aren’t going to embrace potential relationships, why date?
Sleeping in the Same Bed
Sleeping in the same bed may be the norm, but that’s changing. Choosing Therapy has found that 25% of couples actually sleep in different beds. Young couples worry that sleeping separately encourages detachment, but older people know that getting good sleep increases your desire for intimacy and preserves your relationship.
Rushing to Hit Milestones
Relationship milestones include meeting the parents, moving in together, getting engaged, and having a baby, but it’s unhealthy to follow societal rules about when to hit them. Young couples often rush into marriage and children, but age brings perspective, so it’s liberating to ditch that pressure after turning 50.
Sharing Your Every Move
Hiding things from your partner isn’t healthy, but sharing your every move with them isn’t either. Once you’re older, you understand that life gets busy with work, childcare, household maintenance, and social obligations, so you simply don’t have time to tell your partner what you’re doing every minute of the day!
Giving the Cold Shoulder
Have you ever heard the phrase ‘treat them mean to keep them keen’? It’s a relationship rule that encourages giving the cold shoulder to make the other person try harder. However, playing mind games is exhausting and immature, and most older people understand how manipulative it is.
Having Expensive Dates
Dating can be expensive, so don’t bow to the pressure of romantic rules when you’re older and want to save your money for other things. Verywell Mind offers plenty of ideas for cheap dates: picnics, hiking, museums, cooking together, and stargazing. The older you get, the more you prioritize quality time over money.
Always Eating Together
Eating together is a great way to catch up with your partner and hear about their day, but your relationship won’t disintegrate if you can’t eat every meal together, no matter what the rules say. Meals are usually circumstantial, so don’t be afraid to embrace your priorities as an adult over 50.
Refusing to Define the Relationship
Relationship rules emphasize the significance of labels, but you can confidently ditch these after turning 50. People who refuse to define their relationships are juvenile and show a lack of commitment. Don’t be scared to end things with flaky partners who won’t honor relationship commitments.
Needing to Be Right
Young people are taught to defend their opinions confidently, but constantly needing to be right is relationship poison. After hitting 50, you have the life experience and maturity to understand why it’s a good idea to let trivial things go and avoid correcting your partner, making them feel inadequate.
Not Going to Bed Mad
Couples are frequently warned not to go to bed before settling an argument, but this isn’t always the best advice. HuffPost argues that it’s acceptable to go to sleep while mad if you’re tired, drunk, or too worked up to hash out an argument. The older you get, the more you realize this!
Having Unrealistic Expectations
As we age, we understand the dynamics of a healthy relationship and know when to curb our expectations. People who are just starting to date often expect it to be a fairytale without any barriers to overcome. Once you turn 50, you can confidently shatter your unrealistic expectations and enjoy authentic relationships.
Making Things Complicated
Finally, always remember that the happiest relationships feel effortless, and the older you get, the less patience you have for complications. We’re taught that we need to fight for the things we love, but making things needlessly complicated ruins the fun of a relationship, so ditch this rule as soon as possible.
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